701 00:46:02,071 --> 00:46:04,948 Did I say she was primitive? I retract that. She's feral. 702 00:46:05,491 --> 00:46:08,285 I've never spent a more physically destructive evening in my life. 703 00:46:08,327 --> 00:46:10,287 I am nauseated. I limp. 704 00:46:10,329 --> 00:46:13,499 And I can feel my teeth rotting away from an excess of sugar ... 705 00:46:13,540 --> 00:46:15,793 that no amount of toothpaste can dislodge. 706 00:46:15,834 --> 00:46:18,712 I will taste those damn Malaga coolers forever. 707 00:46:18,796 --> 00:46:20,964 That woman is a menace not only to health ... 708 00:46:21,006 --> 00:46:23,217 but to Western civilization as we know it. 709 00:46:23,258 --> 00:46:25,052 She does not deserve to live. 710 00:46:27,388 --> 00:46:28,555 Forget I said that. 711 00:46:31,016 --> 00:46:31,892 Yes. 712 00:46:36,105 --> 00:46:36,980 He did it. 713 00:46:37,481 --> 00:46:40,359 He did it. Oh, get off my lap, you little ingrate! Get off! 714 00:46:44,655 --> 00:46:48,575 He did it. He really, really did it. 715 00:46:49,910 --> 00:46:53,372 Yes, yes. I know who Henrietta Lowell's attorney is. 716 00:46:54,081 --> 00:46:56,500 In fact, he has an office somewhere in this building. 717 00:46:58,043 --> 00:47:00,004 Well, let's put it this way, Harry. 718 00:47:00,045 --> 00:47:02,881 He doesn't seem to have a very active practice. 719 00:47:03,048 --> 00:47:05,759 Henrietta Lowell seems to be his only client. 720 00:47:06,602 --> 00:47:07,687 Well, what I mean is ... 721 00:47:08,070 --> 00:47:10,364 he may not be exactly overjoyed ... 722 00:47:10,606 --> 00:47:13,692 at the idea of sharing her affections with Henry. 723 00:47:13,934 --> 00:47:17,646 - No! No, no, no! No ... - Andrew. 724 00:47:18,105 --> 00:47:21,275 No, I won't accept it. As your lawyer, I forbid it. 725 00:47:21,358 --> 00:47:22,609 But Andrew, I'm in love. 726 00:47:22,651 --> 00:47:25,112 Nonsense. After three days? 727 00:47:25,487 --> 00:47:27,740 Who is he? One of your students? 728 00:47:28,115 --> 00:47:31,368 That little wino who went with you on one of your field trips to the Canary Islands? 729 00:47:31,410 --> 00:47:33,287 Malcolm Finger is not a wino, Andrew. 730 00:47:33,328 --> 00:47:34,079 But it is him? 731 00:47:34,121 --> 00:47:35,289 - No, it is not. - Well then, who is it? 732 00:47:35,706 --> 00:47:36,874 A foreigner? 733 00:47:36,915 --> 00:47:39,084 Some little wop with a fancy title? 734 00:47:39,918 --> 00:47:42,463 What's the little fortune hunter's name? 735 00:47:42,880 --> 00:47:43,964 Really, Andrew. 736 00:47:44,006 --> 00:47:45,716 I don't see why you take it for granted ... 737 00:47:45,799 --> 00:47:48,385 that the only reason that somebody would marry me is for my money. 738 00:47:48,427 --> 00:47:50,971 There may be some other basis, you know? 739 00:47:52,181 --> 00:47:56,518 Oh my God. Oh my God. Of course, Henrietta. Don't you think that I know? 740 00:47:56,852 --> 00:48:00,606 Haven't I proposed to you these past ten years on whatever other basis there is? 741 00:48:00,647 --> 00:48:03,609 Look, it's ... it's just that ... with your discreet beauty ... 742 00:48:03,817 --> 00:48:05,152 and womanly presence ... 743 00:48:05,235 --> 00:48:07,112 I find it deeply suspicious for anyone ... 744 00:48:07,279 --> 00:48:08,614 who claims to ... 745 00:48:08,655 --> 00:48:09,990 penetrate the many mysteries ... 746 00:48:10,032 --> 00:48:12,826 of your personality in just three days. 747 00:48:12,910 --> 00:48:14,828 You're saying that I'm plain and shy ... 748 00:48:14,870 --> 00:48:17,122 but that after a while you get used to it. 749 00:48:17,373 --> 00:48:22,711 I'm saying that you're not flagrant. I'm saying that you're subtle. 750 00:48:22,920 --> 00:48:29,176 Like some very expensive ... custom-made ... hat. 751 00:48:30,636 --> 00:48:34,223 I don't know what I'm saying. Can't you see that I'm distraught? 752 00:48:36,016 --> 00:48:40,938 Andrew. Andrew, listen to me. You will find ... You will find someone else. 753 00:48:41,021 --> 00:48:44,566 Andrew, you will find some wonderful woman who deserves you. 754 00:48:45,651 --> 00:48:50,197 Are you alright, Andrew? Andrew, oh, please. What's wrong? 755 00:48:50,364 --> 00:48:51,865 Nothing, Henrietta. Nothing. 756 00:48:55,244 --> 00:48:57,997 - Henrietta, darling ... - No, no! Andrew! No more ... 757 00:49:00,958 --> 00:49:04,670 Andrew, I'm going now. I'm leaving, in order to meet Henry ... 758 00:49:04,712 --> 00:49:08,382 who, it just so happens, is an American citizen of English extraction ... 759 00:49:08,424 --> 00:49:10,676 with a very large fortune of his own. 760 00:49:11,927 --> 00:49:13,262 - Oh, really? - Yes. 761 00:49:14,972 --> 00:49:17,808 - What's Henry's last name? - Graham. 762 00:49:18,600 --> 00:49:21,937 Oh, Andrew, please. Please come to the wedding. 763 00:49:22,104 --> 00:49:25,919 I'll be so disappointed if you don't give me away. Please? 764 00:49:26,131 --> 00:49:28,331 - Please? - Alright, alright. 765 00:49:37,578 --> 00:49:43,250 Henry Graham. You won't get away with it, Henry Graham. 766 00:49:43,459 --> 00:49:48,297 Won't will not get away with it! Let me see. Now, I have to do something. 767 00:49:48,589 --> 00:49:51,967 Who do I know who's pregnant and a good sport? 768 00:49:56,638 --> 00:50:00,476 - Yes, Mariamne? - A Mr Harry Graham is on 21, sir. 769 00:50:00,726 --> 00:50:03,645 He says it's extremely urgent and confidential. 770 00:50:03,937 --> 00:50:05,397 - Harry Graham? - Yes, sir. 771 00:50:05,939 --> 00:50:07,191 Very well, put him on. 772 00:50:08,233 --> 00:50:10,527 Little ninny, doesn't even know his right name. 773 00:50:13,697 --> 00:50:15,282 Mr Graham. 774 00:50:16,450 --> 00:50:18,577 You wonder why I called you here today. 775 00:50:18,702 --> 00:50:22,539 One day before the ceremony that will unite you as man and wife. 776 00:50:22,665 --> 00:50:24,333 Let me explain. 777 00:50:24,458 --> 00:50:28,761 As Henrietta's friend and attorney, it behooves me ... 778 00:50:28,770 --> 00:50:31,882 ... to take on the ever unpleasant role of the devil's advocate. 779 00:50:31,924 --> 00:50:35,427 And despite her assurances that you are a man of means ... 780 00:50:35,803 --> 00:50:39,807 I've taken it upon myself to investigate your financial status. 781 00:50:43,811 --> 00:50:47,648 Excuse me, sir. Tea will be delayed by 7 minutes. 782 00:50:49,108 --> 00:50:51,193 - Andrew, you had no right to do that. - Alright. 783 00:50:51,235 --> 00:50:54,613 It's quite alright, Henrietta. I have nothing to hide. 784 00:50:54,655 --> 00:50:57,991 The Grahams have been with the same bank for six generations ... 785 00:50:58,033 --> 00:51:00,244 as Mr McPherson has undoubtedly discovered. 786 00:51:00,452 --> 00:51:02,413 I didn't speak to the bank, Mr Graham. 787 00:51:02,997 --> 00:51:04,540 I spoke to your uncle. 788 00:51:07,167 --> 00:51:09,211 Your butler seems to have weak wrists. 789 00:51:09,628 --> 00:51:12,589 Andrew, I think it's just dreadful of you to do that. 790 00:51:12,631 --> 00:51:14,383 To call Henry's uncle and speak to him ... 791 00:51:14,591 --> 00:51:17,469 as if he were opening up some kind of charge account. 792 00:51:17,511 --> 00:51:18,846 I'm so sorry, Henry. 793 00:51:18,887 --> 00:51:23,100 Henrietta, I didn't call Henry's uncle. Henry's uncle called me ... 794 00:51:23,434 --> 00:51:25,894 in order to tell me that his nephew here ... 795 00:51:25,936 --> 00:51:29,648 borrowed $50,000 from him five and a half weeks ago ... 796 00:51:29,940 --> 00:51:31,275 because his trust fund ran out ... 797 00:51:31,316 --> 00:51:33,110 and he had to pay some back bills ... 798 00:51:33,402 --> 00:51:37,072 and marry a wealthy woman before the news of it got around. 799 00:51:37,114 --> 00:51:41,660 I hope you can substantiate this hearsay, because I intend to sue you for slander. 800 00:51:41,910 --> 00:51:45,456 Oh, I can substantiate it alright. I wouldn't be here if I couldn't. 801 00:51:49,335 --> 00:51:53,172 Henrietta, here's a photostat of the original note. 802 00:51:53,714 --> 00:51:55,382 Now take a good look at it. 803 00:52:01,096 --> 00:52:02,973 They're rather interesting terms, aren't they? 804 00:52:03,015 --> 00:52:05,184 You're still gonna sue me for slander, Mr Graham? 805 00:52:05,392 --> 00:52:09,188 Yes, Mr McPherson. I am still going to sue you for slander. 806 00:52:23,869 --> 00:52:27,456 You see, McPherson, I knew for several years ... 807 00:52:27,665 --> 00:52:29,249 that my money was running out. 808 00:52:29,291 --> 00:52:31,919 Now, if you can convince a court ... 809 00:52:32,169 --> 00:52:35,130 that any man with the slightest interest at all in money ... 810 00:52:35,172 --> 00:52:38,092 would sit around for several years doing nothing ... 811 00:52:38,133 --> 00:52:39,843 while his money ran out ... 812 00:52:40,094 --> 00:52:45,474 and then borrow $50,000 under the most disadvantageous terms imaginable ... 813 00:52:45,516 --> 00:52:50,145 so that he could dash out and catch himself a rich wife ... 814 00:52:50,187 --> 00:52:53,440 in order to pay it back within six weeks ... 815 00:52:53,482 --> 00:52:57,945 I will withdraw my suit for slander. 816 00:52:58,612 --> 00:52:59,738 Alright. 817 00:53:05,077 --> 00:53:07,037 Now, let's put in this way, Graham. 818 00:53:12,626 --> 00:53:15,212 Now, let's put in this way, Graham. 819 00:53:16,338 --> 00:53:18,632 If you can convince a court ... 820 00:53:18,674 --> 00:53:23,178 that any man without any interest at all whatsoever in money of any kind ... 821 00:53:23,262 --> 00:53:26,765 would borrow $50,000 for no reason at all ... 822 00:53:26,807 --> 00:53:29,268 I'll withdraw my charge. 823 00:53:29,893 --> 00:53:31,061 Agreed. 824 00:53:35,691 --> 00:53:37,234 Alright. Let's hear the reason. 825 00:53:37,317 --> 00:53:42,656 Now, you were going to use the $50,000 to set up a fund for the disadvantaged ... 826 00:53:42,698 --> 00:53:45,659 and make a better world. Am I close? 827 00:53:46,100 --> 00:53:48,867 No sense in being facetious, Mr McPherson. 828 00:53:50,039 --> 00:53:53,667 I was going to use the $50,000 to tidy up my affairs ... 829 00:53:54,793 --> 00:53:56,587 and then immediately afterwards ... 830 00:53:57,796 --> 00:53:59,006 kill myself. 831 00:54:02,509 --> 00:54:05,262 Yes, Henrietta. On the day I met you I was a dead man. 832 00:54:05,346 --> 00:54:07,890 My life was over. And then ... 833 00:54:09,224 --> 00:54:10,517 something happened to me. 834 00:54:10,893 --> 00:54:13,520 I suddenly realized that if ... 835 00:54:13,937 --> 00:54:16,398 by some miracle I could have you ... 836 00:54:16,440 --> 00:54:21,111 I would have a purpose, an answer to the emptiness of my existence. 837 00:54:21,528 --> 00:54:24,323 And so I proposed, Henrietta. Not to get your money ... 838 00:54:24,365 --> 00:54:28,160 but to find out if I had a reason to live. 839 00:54:29,328 --> 00:54:31,622 Henry, why didn't you tell me? 840 00:54:32,039 --> 00:54:35,250 I would have married you the very first day. 841 00:54:39,880 --> 00:54:44,551 Henrietta, wait a minute! You don't believe that garbage, do you? 842 00:54:44,635 --> 00:54:48,263 Any sex-starved half-wit would know that's just a line. What's the matter with you? 843 00:54:48,305 --> 00:54:50,808 You have been unbelievably cruel. 844 00:54:50,849 --> 00:54:53,018 Thank you for keeping me alive, Henrietta. 845 00:54:53,060 --> 00:54:55,938 You're welcome, Henry. You're entirely welcome. 846 00:54:56,480 --> 00:54:58,065 I can't believe this! 847 00:54:59,400 --> 00:55:02,105 - Get off. - I beg of you, Henrietta ... Sorry ... 848 00:55:02,528 --> 00:55:05,850 I beg of you, Henrietta. Don't get carried away. Henrietta ... 849 00:55:06,073 --> 00:55:08,909 If he's not really interested in your money, make him prove it! 850 00:55:09,034 --> 00:55:12,121 I would do anything in the world to prove to you, Henrietta ... 851 00:55:12,204 --> 00:55:14,915 that I haven't the slightest interest at all in your money ... 852 00:55:14,957 --> 00:55:17,126 but there is absolutely no way I can do it. 853 00:55:17,167 --> 00:55:19,400 - There is no way. - I have a way. 854 00:55:19,600 --> 00:55:21,547 - But there is no way. - Henrietta, I have a way. 855 00:55:22,548 --> 00:55:25,050 Have him consent to some kind of legal arrangement ... 856 00:55:25,092 --> 00:55:27,886 that prevents him from gaining financially after the marriage. 857 00:55:27,928 --> 00:55:28,846 Don't listen to him, Henrietta. 858 00:55:28,887 --> 00:55:32,516 That way, people won't get the wrong impression from his uncle the way I did. 859 00:55:32,558 --> 00:55:33,809 That's a good idea. 860 00:55:35,019 --> 00:55:39,481 Let's make all my accounts joint with Henry. 861 00:55:39,523 --> 00:55:42,109 And he's to have a checkbook with his name on it. 862 00:55:42,151 --> 00:55:45,112 And I would like the debt to his uncle paid before the wedding. 863 00:55:45,154 --> 00:55:49,158 You would like ... you would ... Are you crazy? 864 00:55:49,283 --> 00:55:50,868 Have you gone totally out of your mind? 865 00:55:50,909 --> 00:55:52,745 - I thought it was your idea. - It was not my idea! 866 00:55:53,203 --> 00:55:56,248 My idea was for him to disclaim all your money, not to share it. 867 00:55:56,290 --> 00:55:59,501 Oh, that's really just ridiculous, Andrew. It's very naive of you. 868 00:55:59,668 --> 00:56:04,256 If Henry disclaimed all my money, I would have to write all of his checks for him. 869 00:56:04,548 --> 00:56:06,216 And then people really would think ... 870 00:56:06,300 --> 00:56:07,843 that he was marrying me for my money. 871 00:56:07,968 --> 00:56:12,056 Don't you see? This way he'll already have all my money. 872 00:56:12,181 --> 00:56:15,434 So that no one can possibly think that he's married me for it. 873 00:56:15,684 --> 00:56:17,269 Don't you think it's a good solution, Henry? 874 00:56:17,311 --> 00:56:20,206 You nincompoop! That's no solution at all. 875 00:56:20,500 --> 00:56:23,492 - Henrietta, I love you. - How dare you call my fiancee a nincompoop? 876 00:56:23,800 --> 00:56:27,321 Harold! Get Mr McPherson's hat and show him out. 877 00:56:27,363 --> 00:56:28,708 - Hat ? - Yes. 878 00:56:28,768 --> 00:56:31,835 We have to get to the bank before it closes at 3 o'clock. 879 00:56:38,633 --> 00:56:40,633 Nein, nein, nein. Nein, nein. 880 00:56:45,089 --> 00:56:48,842 - I thought you were going to play the Bach. - This is what he told me to play. 881 00:56:49,968 --> 00:56:54,890 Harold, you've got to stop her. That little woman. She's touching things. 882 00:56:55,391 --> 00:56:59,436 Oh no. She's ... Harold, she's unscrewing my Montrosini. 883 00:56:59,478 --> 00:57:02,815 You don't have time to make a fuss now, sir. I'll screw it back when she leaves. 884 00:57:02,856 --> 00:57:04,692 She's destroying my living room. 885 00:57:04,858 --> 00:57:06,360 Why did I get into this? 886 00:57:06,402 --> 00:57:09,655 I don't even know her, she's a stranger. I don't want her here. 887 00:57:10,989 --> 00:57:12,032 Get out! 888 00:57:12,074 --> 00:57:14,118 Oh, I thought this was the bathroom. 889 00:57:14,159 --> 00:57:15,369 Well, it's not! 890 00:57:15,411 --> 00:57:17,746 And if you touch anything else, I'll have you arrested. 891 00:57:17,871 --> 00:57:19,540 Oh, sir, get a hold of yourself. 892 00:57:19,623 --> 00:57:21,875 This is what it'll be like, isn't it, Harold? 893 00:57:22,042 --> 00:57:24,378 She'll be everywhere, touching things. 894 00:57:24,461 --> 00:57:26,672 Poking her nose into where it doesn't belong ... 895 00:57:26,714 --> 00:57:28,632 pretending she's looking for the bathroom. 896 00:57:28,674 --> 00:57:30,551 No, sir. You will share things. 897 00:57:30,592 --> 00:57:33,744 I don't want to share things. I want to own them all by myself. 898 00:57:33,804 --> 00:57:36,098 Why are you standing there, you little spy? 899 00:57:36,140 --> 00:57:39,393 McPherson sent you in here to find out what was going on? 900 00:57:39,435 --> 00:57:40,352 Oh, sir. 901 00:57:40,477 --> 00:57:42,896 - Is he the groom? - Don't answer that, Harold. 902 00:57:44,815 --> 00:57:47,276 I'll ask the questions from here on in. 903 00:57:48,569 --> 00:57:51,238 Henrietta, if I could just talk to you ... 904 00:57:53,866 --> 00:57:55,325 Who are you really? 905 00:57:55,743 --> 00:57:56,827 Come on now, let's have it! 906 00:57:56,910 --> 00:57:58,954 And I want real names or else you'll regret it. 907 00:57:58,996 --> 00:58:01,707 I'm Dodi Heinrich. Professor Heinrich's daughter. 908 00:58:01,999 --> 00:58:03,250 Professor Heinrich? 909 00:58:03,292 --> 00:58:06,295 Harold, he's invited some Nazi to the wedding. 910 00:58:06,378 --> 00:58:10,215 Sir, you are hysterical. You must get hold. You are due at the altar now. 911 00:58:10,257 --> 00:58:11,925 I won't move until she leaves. 912 00:58:11,967 --> 00:58:13,552 I will not get dressed in front of a woman ... 913 00:58:13,594 --> 00:58:15,262 and she might as well understand that now. 914 00:58:15,346 --> 00:58:16,889 You already are dressed. 915 00:58:18,682 --> 00:58:20,684 Get her out. Out! 916 00:58:22,311 --> 00:58:25,564 - Miss Heinrich, I will escort you to the bathroom. - Get out! Out! 917 00:58:31,236 --> 00:58:34,448 And she will not touch my things. I will not have her touching my things. 918 00:58:36,575 --> 00:58:38,410 Oh, I'm terribly sorry. 919 00:58:46,126 --> 00:58:49,546 Come on. It's time. What are you doing up there? 920 00:59:03,769 --> 00:59:06,647 Frank, I think one of my legs is shorter than the other. 921 00:59:06,689 --> 00:59:07,748 Yes, I know, old man. It'll get ... 922 00:59:07,731 --> 00:59:09,967 longer again after the ceremony. 923 00:59:17,991 --> 00:59:20,077 Oh, I'll kill her. 924 00:59:54,743 --> 00:59:57,376 Henrietta, it's not too late. 925 00:59:58,237 --> 00:59:59,704 I love you, Henrietta. 926 01:00:00,273 --> 01:00:02,540 Please don't do this insane thing. 927 01:00:02,760 --> 01:00:05,760 Oh, Henrietta, I just talked to his uncle ... 928 01:00:06,006 --> 01:00:07,873 I'll kill myself, Henrietta ... 929 01:00:12,868 --> 01:00:17,601 Would you step back just half a step, so Henry can stand next to Henrietta? 930 01:00:21,400 --> 01:00:22,381 Dearly beloved. 931 01:00:23,591 --> 01:00:25,968 We are gathered together here in the sight of God ... 932 01:00:26,177 --> 01:00:27,803 and in the face of this company ... 933 01:00:28,596 --> 01:00:32,016 to join together this man and this woman in holy matrimony ... 934 01:00:33,392 --> 01:00:37,090 which is an honorable estate instituted of God ... 935 01:00:37,700 --> 01:00:42,233 signifying unto us the mystical union which is betwixt Christ and his church ... 936 01:01:24,276 --> 01:01:26,437 - I'll be leaving now. I hope you'll enjoy your stay. 937 01:01:26,477 --> 01:01:27,877 Thank you. Thank you. 938 01:01:28,572 --> 01:01:33,786 Erm, Henrietta, I will use this chest and you can use that one. 939 01:01:33,828 --> 01:01:36,497 Or would you prefer that I use that chest and you use this one? 940 01:01:37,248 --> 01:01:39,166 That one will be fine. 941 01:01:39,208 --> 01:01:40,751 And I will unpack my own things. 942 01:01:40,793 --> 01:01:42,503 I have a certain way that I unpack my things. 943 01:01:42,670 --> 01:01:44,672 And if anyone touches anything I get mixed up. 944 01:01:45,172 --> 01:01:47,758 - Yes, Henry. - Alright. Then shall we unpack? 945 01:01:50,136 --> 01:01:52,179 I'm just going to dig up this specimen ... 946 01:01:52,263 --> 01:01:54,598 and take it home for classification. 947 01:01:54,640 --> 01:01:57,351 It's probably been classified for years ... 948 01:01:57,393 --> 01:01:59,770 but I might as well just try it anyway. 949 01:01:59,854 --> 01:02:00,646 Why not? 950 01:02:02,440 --> 01:02:04,108 This is really incredible. 951 01:02:04,442 --> 01:02:06,402 I know this isn't a Cyathea. 952 01:02:06,485 --> 01:02:08,195 I know it's an Alsophila but ... 953 01:02:08,237 --> 01:02:12,825 it seems to have some kind of vestigial indusium. 954 01:02:20,071 --> 01:02:21,071 Whoops! 955 01:02:23,878 --> 01:02:26,630 Henry? 956 01:02:37,516 --> 01:02:41,645 Commonly found in gardening sheds. 957 01:02:42,605 --> 01:02:43,731 Perfect. 958 01:02:44,023 --> 01:02:48,486 Spreading and emulsifying agents. 959 01:02:49,904 --> 01:02:52,031 Soap, saponins, gelatin ... 960 01:02:53,199 --> 01:02:57,203 Sticking agents, defloculating agents ... 961 01:02:58,746 --> 01:03:02,625 Get poison from gardening shed. 962 01:03:07,838 --> 01:03:16,013 Toxides: arsenic acid, sodium arsenite, boron compounds, cyanides ... 963 01:03:17,264 --> 01:03:20,309 cyo-cyenates and related compounds ... 964 01:04:26,917 --> 01:04:29,837 Oh, Henrietta, I meant to ask you ... 965 01:04:30,296 --> 01:04:33,340 which, er ... which bed do you prefer ? 966 01:04:33,507 --> 01:04:35,968 This one or that one? Either one is fine for me. 967 01:04:39,138 --> 01:04:40,639 This one is fine. 968 01:04:40,723 --> 01:04:42,558 Fine. Then I will take that one. 969 01:04:42,600 --> 01:04:45,436 And when we both use the same bed, we'll use this one. 970 01:04:47,021 --> 01:04:49,982 - Champagne? - Thank you. 971 01:05:05,623 --> 01:05:08,417 Henrietta, where is your other arm? 972 01:05:09,377 --> 01:05:10,920 It's in the nightgown. 973 01:05:11,003 --> 01:05:13,214 It's a Graecian-style nightgown. 974 01:05:13,422 --> 01:05:17,760 It fits over one shoulder and the other one goes inside. 975 01:05:18,094 --> 01:05:21,263 It's very uncomfortable. I can barely move my head all the way around. 976 01:05:21,347 --> 01:05:26,268 Fine ... I just think you have your head through the arm-hole. 977 01:05:26,310 --> 01:05:28,813 If you'll just stand up for a minute. 978 01:05:29,600 --> 01:05:32,100 That's it. There you are ... 979 01:05:32,700 --> 01:05:36,874 I think ... You see, you have your head through the arm-hole. 980 01:05:38,103 --> 01:05:40,170 Now, pick your arm up ... 981 01:05:41,867 --> 01:05:44,995 No, not that one. Put that one down. 982 01:05:45,287 --> 01:05:49,274 That arm down. Let's pick this arm up. Thaaaat's it. 983 01:05:50,000 --> 01:05:51,585 That's it. 984 01:05:51,627 --> 01:05:53,879 Now, here we are. 985 01:05:54,255 --> 01:05:58,676 - Just get this ... over here ... - Let me put my glasses ... 986 01:05:58,718 --> 01:06:02,096 Oh, here. Let me put your glasses down here. 987 01:06:05,070 --> 01:06:08,337 Alright. Now, hold it ... 988 01:06:08,769 --> 01:06:09,979 No, just a minute. 989 01:06:13,024 --> 01:06:16,193 See, you have your ... you have your head through the arm-hole. 990 01:06:16,235 --> 01:06:20,239 We have to get your head out ... out of the arm-hole. 991 01:06:20,281 --> 01:06:22,575 See, both of the holes look very similar. 992 01:06:22,867 --> 01:06:24,994 Where ... where is your head-hole? 993 01:06:27,538 --> 01:06:29,582 Well, I thought my head was in it. 994 01:06:29,623 --> 01:06:32,126 No. You had your head in the arm-hole. 995 01:06:32,209 --> 01:06:33,753 Where are you now? 996 01:06:33,794 --> 01:06:35,254 I'm still where I was. 997 01:06:35,296 --> 01:06:38,049 - Where ...? - Just a minute. 998 01:06:38,716 --> 01:06:41,927 Oh. Here. That's it. 999 01:06:41,969 --> 01:06:43,262 Here you are. 1000 01:06:43,345 --> 01:06:45,598 - I'll get your arm ... - This arm? 1001 01:06:45,639 --> 01:06:50,644 Yes. Get this arm through ... through ... No, wait a minute. You have ... 1002 01:06:53,564 --> 01:06:55,149 There. That's it. 1003 01:06:55,358 --> 01:06:56,484 Now put this arm ... 1004 01:06:57,360 --> 01:06:59,111 through here. 1005 01:06:59,153 --> 01:07:03,449 This is a head-and-left-arm hole. 1006 01:07:04,784 --> 01:07:07,370 Here. There you are. 1007 01:07:08,621 --> 01:07:10,689 - That's it. That's it! - Oh, I see. 1008 01:07:10,915 --> 01:07:17,171 Now, there! That's the way ... it's supposed to ... It still looks strange. 1009 01:07:17,588 --> 01:07:20,633 I'm sorry to be so much trouble to you. 1010 01:07:20,716 --> 01:07:22,343 That's alright. It's not for long ... 1011 01:07:27,973 --> 01:07:31,102 - Harold, Harold! - Welcome home. 1012 01:07:31,143 --> 01:07:32,770 - Where is Mrs Graham, sir? - Who? 1013 01:07:32,812 --> 01:07:34,772 Is she not with you, sir? Where is she, sir? 1014 01:07:34,855 --> 01:07:35,773 Hello. 1015 01:07:35,981 --> 01:07:39,151 Oh, there you are, Madam. Oh, welcome home, Mrs Graham. 1016 01:07:39,193 --> 01:07:42,321 May ... may I express my great joy at seeing you ... again. 1017 01:07:42,947 --> 01:07:44,824 Thank you, Harold. Heavens. 1018 01:07:45,533 --> 01:07:47,368 Harold, where is the chauffeur? 1019 01:07:48,494 --> 01:07:49,620 I couldn't find him, sir. 1020 01:07:49,704 --> 01:07:51,414 He disappeared just as I was about to leave. 1021 01:07:51,455 --> 01:07:52,873 - Couldn't find him ? - No. 1022 01:07:52,957 --> 01:07:54,834 John is a little forgetful, dear. 1023 01:07:55,084 --> 01:07:56,919 That's why I usually take the bus. 1024 01:07:57,420 --> 01:07:59,964 - Who's John? - John is the chauffeur. 1025 01:08:00,131 --> 01:08:01,507 His memory lapses. 1026 01:08:01,590 --> 01:08:03,634 I ... I think you ought to prepare yourself, sir. 1027 01:08:03,676 --> 01:08:06,470 Mrs Graham's household is incredibly democratic. 1028 01:08:08,108 --> 01:08:09,908 Couldn't find the chauffeur? 1029 01:08:21,777 --> 01:08:24,822 Chauffeur? Chauffeur! 1030 01:08:24,864 --> 01:08:26,745 Well, you're early. 1031 01:08:27,669 --> 01:08:31,536 Well, welcome home and congratulations. 1032 01:08:32,496 --> 01:08:37,168 Mrs Traggert, I'd like you to meet my husband, Henry Graham. 1033 01:08:37,209 --> 01:08:38,018 How do you do? 1034 01:08:38,044 --> 01:08:42,006 Henry, this is the housekeeper, our housekeeper, Mrs Traggert. 1035 01:08:42,256 --> 01:08:44,216 May I ask where the chauffeur is? 1036 01:08:45,134 --> 01:08:48,220 Well, didn't he pick you up at the airport? 1037 01:08:48,345 --> 01:08:49,597 No, he did not. 1038 01:08:50,014 --> 01:08:52,016 Oh, well ... 1039 01:08:52,058 --> 01:08:57,271 I guess, er, his car broke down. I'll have to look into that. 1040 01:08:58,147 --> 01:09:01,108 Will you ... you're wanting dinner at home this evening? 1041 01:09:01,692 --> 01:09:04,737 Henry, would you want dinner at home this evening? 1042 01:09:04,779 --> 01:09:06,655 Yes, supper for two, Mrs Traggert. 1043 01:09:07,448 --> 01:09:08,741 Very good. 1044 01:09:11,535 --> 01:09:13,120 Thank you, Mrs Traggert. 1045 01:09:13,204 --> 01:09:14,413 You're welcome. 1046 01:09:17,375 --> 01:09:22,546 - Well, how do you like it so far, dear? - Well, I've only seen the foyer. 1047 01:09:22,671 --> 01:09:26,592 Oh, well, this is the main hall. 1048 01:09:35,477 --> 01:09:39,777 Oh, baby. Oh, I need you. Oh, I want you. Aah ... ooh ... 1049 01:09:42,024 --> 01:09:45,336 Oh, who ... who are they? 1050 01:09:45,569 --> 01:09:51,701 Erm, one of them was a maid and the other ... er ... was the chauffeur. 1051 01:09:52,868 --> 01:09:54,537 - John, the chauffeur? - Yes. 1052 01:09:55,746 --> 01:09:58,332 Tell me, Henrietta, on what basis do you hire your servants? 1053 01:09:58,416 --> 01:10:00,626 Efficiency or personal charm? 1054 01:10:01,210 --> 01:10:04,922 Both, actually. I mean, I don't actually hire them. 1055 01:10:05,047 --> 01:10:09,516 Mrs Traggert does now do the hiring, but I, er ... 1056 01:10:10,793 --> 01:10:15,226 When I did hire them, I used both criteria. 1057 01:10:15,281 --> 01:10:16,281 Oh, er, madam? 1058 01:10:16,991 --> 01:10:19,391 Are you a guest in ...? Is she ...? 1059 01:10:21,621 --> 01:10:25,654 Madam, would you mind using the servants' staircase? 1060 01:10:25,741 --> 01:10:27,241 This is Mrs Blair. 1061 01:10:27,403 --> 01:10:28,903 This is the cook's daughter, Mandy. 1062 01:10:43,085 --> 01:10:47,089 Er, Madam, would you mind letting us through? We ... Harold! 1063 01:10:48,038 --> 01:10:49,038 - Harold? - Yes, sir? 1064 01:10:49,425 --> 01:10:53,304 Harold, get the household accounts from Mrs Traggert immediately ... 1065 01:10:53,471 --> 01:10:54,972 and meet me in the drawing room in ten minutes. 1066 01:10:55,056 --> 01:10:56,348 You can finish the luggage later. 1067 01:10:57,391 --> 01:11:00,568 - You may go now, Harold. - Yes. 1068 01:11:02,400 --> 01:11:05,274 This is insane. Absolutely astonishing. 1069 01:11:05,358 --> 01:11:07,943 I thought it might be, sir. She keeps it under the mattress. 1070 01:11:09,737 --> 01:11:11,155 Hm. Look at this, Harold. 1071 01:11:12,073 --> 01:11:16,243 There are 17 servants in this house, including a cook's daughter ... 1072 01:11:16,285 --> 01:11:20,247 who gets $200 a week as her mother's helper. 1073 01:11:22,249 --> 01:11:25,920 The food bills average out to $130 a day. 1074 01:11:27,088 --> 01:11:28,381 And there are no receipts. 1075 01:11:29,965 --> 01:11:34,345 Miscellaneous: $6,000 a month. 1076 01:11:35,596 --> 01:11:36,972 Harold, after dinner ... 1077 01:11:37,098 --> 01:11:38,682 I want all the servants in this room ... 1078 01:11:38,724 --> 01:11:41,811 and be sure that Mrs Graham is not present. 1079 01:11:42,144 --> 01:11:44,772 Copy this ledger exactly and put it back under the mattress. 1080 01:11:44,814 --> 01:11:45,856 Certainly, sir. 1081 01:11:46,649 --> 01:11:50,486 Harold, do you happen to know where the gardening shed is? 1082 01:11:50,528 --> 01:11:52,196 Yes, sir. It's in the back of the garden. 1083 01:11:52,530 --> 01:11:57,868 Oh, good. Well, I guess I'll take a stroll around the grounds. 1084 01:11:58,160 --> 01:12:00,496 We don't have anything like that, Mr Graham. 1085 01:12:00,538 --> 01:12:01,997 Mrs Graham wouldn't allow it. 1086 01:12:02,039 --> 01:12:04,792 She's a strict believer in the organic method. 1087 01:12:05,126 --> 01:12:09,141 But surely some of the more basic pesticides ... 1088 01:12:09,191 --> 01:12:12,558 arsenic, strychnine ... that kind of thing. 1089 01:12:12,683 --> 01:12:16,554 No. A healthy plant in a healthy soil. 1090 01:12:16,595 --> 01:12:17,930 That's the organic method. 1091 01:12:18,806 --> 01:12:19,974 It works, too. 1092 01:12:20,182 --> 01:12:21,726 Oh, really? 1093 01:12:22,400 --> 01:12:27,114 Well ... if it really works, why change it? 1094 01:12:44,540 --> 01:12:48,919 Mr Graham, on behalf of the entire staff, I would like to welcome you aboard ... 1095 01:12:48,961 --> 01:12:51,271 and drink a toast to your success. 1096 01:12:52,500 --> 01:12:54,800 Thank you very much, Mrs Traggert. No, thank you. 1097 01:12:56,700 --> 01:12:58,300 No, thank you very much. 1098 01:12:59,300 --> 01:13:00,500 Mrs Traggert ... 1099 01:13:04,500 --> 01:13:05,800 No, thank you. 1100 01:13:05,978 --> 01:13:08,314 I would like to say a word, please, Mrs Traggert? 1101 01:13:08,556 --> 01:13:10,807 There's something about you that puzzles me. 1102 01:13:11,258 --> 01:13:15,037 Why do you continue on in the arduous position of housekeeper ... 1103 01:13:15,079 --> 01:13:17,081 when by investing wisely you could have ... 1104 01:13:17,122 --> 01:13:19,917 your own little townhouse in Sutton Place? 1105 01:13:23,871 --> 01:13:26,165 And a guaranteed income for life. 1106 01:13:28,459 --> 01:13:31,170 Surely, after having successfully managed ... 1107 01:13:31,212 --> 01:13:33,381 to head the household accounts ... 1108 01:13:33,547 --> 01:13:38,177 to the tune of 35,000 tax-free dollars per year, for the past five years ... 1109 01:13:38,219 --> 01:13:39,929 you must have salted something away. 1110 01:13:40,125 --> 01:13:41,425 Have I ever. 1111 01:13:42,473 --> 01:13:43,849 I'm not including, of course ... 1112 01:13:43,974 --> 01:13:46,143 the token salary of $800 a week 1113 01:13:46,394 --> 01:13:47,937 - Four ... four hundred. - Oh. 1114 01:13:48,896 --> 01:13:50,606 you receive as mad money. 1115 01:13:50,883 --> 01:13:51,883 Huh, is it mad? 1116 01:13:58,030 --> 01:13:59,824 Mrs Traggert, you're fired. 1117 01:14:02,910 --> 01:14:04,912 I don't understand. I don't know what that means. 1118 01:14:05,154 --> 01:14:07,281 It means that you are a thief, Mrs Traggert. 1119 01:14:07,748 --> 01:14:11,252 On what grounds are you making this accusation? 1120 01:14:11,293 --> 01:14:13,045 I'm calling you a thief ... 1121 01:14:13,087 --> 01:14:15,673 on the basis of the household accounts ... 1122 01:14:15,715 --> 01:14:18,008 which you very sensibly hid under your mattress. 1123 01:14:19,552 --> 01:14:23,639 Listen, Mr Graham, could I speak to you for just one little minute, please? 1124 01:14:24,056 --> 01:14:27,017 The time is now 7 minutes past 9 o'clock. 1125 01:14:27,101 --> 01:14:29,729 If you are not out of this house by 10, I will call the police. 1126 01:14:29,770 --> 01:14:32,440 Shall we synchronize our watches or would you rather go for broke? 1127 01:14:32,481 --> 01:14:36,652 Uh, eh ... You, er, you wouldn't like to hear my side of the story? 1128 01:14:40,990 --> 01:14:43,242 Alright, alright! I'm leaving. 1129 01:14:46,954 --> 01:14:49,373 - Oh, John. - Yes, sir? 1130 01:14:49,415 --> 01:14:51,584 John, do you think we ought to scrap our cars? 1131 01:14:53,109 --> 01:14:53,418 Huh? 1132 01:14:53,460 --> 01:14:56,113 You see, according to your gas consumption and mileage record ... 1133 01:14:56,597 --> 01:14:59,892 each car averages 15 miles a day ... 1134 01:14:59,933 --> 01:15:03,771 at 1 mile per gallon, while parked in a garage. 1135 01:15:03,796 --> 01:15:07,058 It would mean bankruptcy if we actually took them out on the road. 1136 01:15:07,399 --> 01:15:09,518 We did those figures wrong ... 1137 01:15:09,518 --> 01:15:11,896 by about ... half. 1138 01:15:12,229 --> 01:15:13,606 John, do you have a suitcase? 1139 01:15:14,440 --> 01:15:19,653 Yeah, I have five. I could always use another one. 1140 01:15:19,737 --> 01:15:21,405 Well, five will do very nicely, John. 1141 01:15:21,989 --> 01:15:26,619 Pack all five and be out of this house in 45 minutes ... 1142 01:15:26,660 --> 01:15:29,080 or I will shoot you on sight for trespassing. 1143 01:15:30,831 --> 01:15:32,666 I-I-I, I don't get it. 1144 01:15:32,750 --> 01:15:34,460 I'll try to clarify it, John. 1145 01:15:34,502 --> 01:15:37,505 You're being fired because you are a cheap crook. 1146 01:15:37,546 --> 01:15:42,218 Now, if you are not out of this house and off these grounds in 45 minutes ... 1147 01:15:42,259 --> 01:15:44,929 I will shoot you as a trespasser ... 1148 01:15:45,012 --> 01:15:47,348 with proved criminal intentions. 1149 01:15:47,390 --> 01:15:51,644 And I am an excellent shot. Does that make it clearer? 1150 01:15:55,357 --> 01:16:02,146 Well, er ... why, if you gotta act like that ... I quit. 1151 01:16:06,784 --> 01:16:11,539 As for the rest of you, you have exactly two hours to get out. 1152 01:16:11,914 --> 01:16:13,374 Out! 1153 01:16:15,251 --> 01:16:18,003 And I do not believe that for one second. 1154 01:16:21,843 --> 01:16:23,876 Is the party over already? 1155 01:16:27,596 --> 01:16:29,348 You too, Madam. 1156 01:16:30,383 --> 01:16:31,983 He means business! 1157 01:16:43,112 --> 01:16:47,858 Henry, there are a lot of strange people in the house, who are they? 1158 01:16:47,925 --> 01:16:49,844 Yeah. They are not people, Henrietta, they are servants. 1159 01:16:49,927 --> 01:16:51,203 I hired them this morning. 1160 01:16:51,287 --> 01:16:52,955 You know, Henry, Mrs Traggert will be furious. 1161 01:16:53,372 --> 01:16:55,791 Mrs Traggert has been fired along with the rest of the staff ... 1162 01:16:55,916 --> 01:16:58,502 so her emotional responses need no longer concern you. 1163 01:16:58,544 --> 01:17:00,671 Oh, Erica, this is Mrs Graham. 1164 01:17:00,713 --> 01:17:03,090 This is our new housekeeper. She'll be working under Harold. 1165 01:17:04,674 --> 01:17:08,241 Fine. Fine. Thank you. You may go now, Erica. 1166 01:17:08,554 --> 01:17:12,683 Henrietta, come, please. Thank you. You may go, Erica. 1167 01:17:12,767 --> 01:17:15,353 Henrietta, come. 1168 01:17:15,603 --> 01:17:17,980 Don't shake hands, please. 1169 01:17:18,022 --> 01:17:20,107 Don't shake hands with the servants, Henrietta. 1170 01:17:20,191 --> 01:17:23,361 It destroys all hope of any discipline. 1171 01:17:23,444 --> 01:17:26,489 - You fired Mrs Traggert? - Yes, I fired Mrs Traggert. 1172 01:17:26,530 --> 01:17:29,241 - You fired John, too? - Especially John. 1173 01:17:29,909 --> 01:17:31,118 And they agreed? 1174 01:17:31,160 --> 01:17:32,953 We didn't vote on it, Henrietta. 1175 01:17:33,162 --> 01:17:34,538 I simply told them they were fired. 1176 01:17:34,580 --> 01:17:35,915 Which reminds me ... 1177 01:17:36,082 --> 01:17:38,751 How attached are you to Mr McPherson? 1178 01:17:39,627 --> 01:17:42,421 Oh no, oh no, Henry. 1179 01:17:42,463 --> 01:17:44,048 He's a total incompetent, Henrietta. 1180 01:17:44,131 --> 01:17:47,093 Do you have an idea how much money has been spent to run this house? 1181 01:17:47,426 --> 01:17:49,387 No, but Andrew knows. 1182 01:17:49,428 --> 01:17:51,722 Andrew has co-signed all of Mrs Traggert's checks. 1183 01:17:51,847 --> 01:17:54,141 Really, he has his finger on everything. 1184 01:17:54,433 --> 01:17:56,811 He co-signed all of Mrs Traggert's checks? 1185 01:17:56,936 --> 01:17:58,905 Yes. He's very thorough. 1186 01:17:59,700 --> 01:18:04,664 - Henry ... - Did ... you ... allow Mrs Traggert ... 1187 01:18:06,281 --> 01:18:09,448 to have ... her own ... checking account? 1188 01:18:10,491 --> 01:18:12,451 Yes. It was the household account. 1189 01:18:12,493 --> 01:18:15,162 She said it would be easier for her. 1190 01:18:15,329 --> 01:18:18,165 So I ... I, er ... did. 1191 01:18:19,750 --> 01:18:22,002 - Henrietta. - Yes? 1192 01:18:24,755 --> 01:18:25,923 Never, er, never mind ... I ... 1193 01:18:27,174 --> 01:18:30,344 Henrietta, I'll handle the finances from here on in. 1194 01:18:30,428 --> 01:18:31,137 Yes. 1195 01:18:31,178 --> 01:18:34,682 I would like the bank to issue a statement covering all your accounts ... 1196 01:18:36,416 --> 01:18:40,581 and please instruct them that no check has to be drawn on any account ... 1197 01:18:40,636 --> 01:18:42,569 unless it was co-signed by me. 1198 01:18:43,024 --> 01:18:48,195 I can go over your holdings and your federal and state tax returns after you're... 1199 01:18:49,071 --> 01:18:53,284 after you're ... after, afterwa-, afterwards. 1200 01:18:54,177 --> 01:18:57,477 Holdings and federal, okay. Heavens. Oh. 1201 01:18:58,039 --> 01:18:59,623 Just a piece of cotton, dear. 1202 01:19:01,792 --> 01:19:03,961 - Oh, Henrietta? - Yes? 1203 01:19:04,045 --> 01:19:07,715 I suppose you're absolutely satisfied with the organic method? 1204 01:19:07,882 --> 01:19:09,967 Oh, yes. Yes, I am. 1205 01:19:18,583 --> 01:19:19,253 - Shut up! 1206 01:19:19,315 --> 01:19:20,982 Now, Mr McPherson. I want you to do something about this. 1207 01:19:21,354 --> 01:19:24,097 - I didn't even get my two weeks' notice. - Nobody did. 1208 01:19:24,982 --> 01:19:26,400 If a judge sees those salaries ... 1209 01:19:26,442 --> 01:19:28,569 he'll clamp you in jail on spec. 1210 01:19:29,320 --> 01:19:32,323 Very few chauffeurs make $600 a week. 1211 01:19:32,365 --> 01:19:36,035 - $300. You get half ... - From all of us. 1212 01:19:36,077 --> 01:19:38,871 I advise you to keep your mouth shut about that. 1213 01:19:39,914 --> 01:19:43,117 According to the records, I don't take anything at all, and don't you forget it. 1214 01:19:43,392 --> 01:19:44,392 Is that so? 1215 01:19:44,913 --> 01:19:52,013 Alright, alright. Laura! Take it easy. Wait a minute. Wait. Laura? Lester? 1216 01:19:52,051 --> 01:19:54,328 - Laura. Kids. - I'm not a kid. 1217 01:19:54,412 --> 01:19:56,271 - Now, wait a minute. Wait a minute. - Let him talk. 1218 01:19:56,355 --> 01:19:58,732 Kids, we've been together a long time, right? 1219 01:19:59,308 --> 01:20:00,935 We've been a great team. 1220 01:20:01,352 --> 01:20:05,648 We've had some bad years and good years. 1221 01:20:06,732 --> 01:20:10,444 We laughed a little. Cried a little. 1222 01:20:11,904 --> 01:20:16,075 Put a little away together. But it's all over now. 1223 01:20:17,576 --> 01:20:19,328 There's nothing we can do about it. 1224 01:20:21,539 --> 01:20:22,456 - Yes, Mariamne? 1225 01:20:23,374 --> 01:20:24,792 The bank chief called ... 1226 01:20:24,834 --> 01:20:26,502 saying that Mr Graham has instructed them ... 1227 01:20:26,544 --> 01:20:29,255 not to issue any funds without his signature. 1228 01:20:37,096 --> 01:20:40,307 Henry, you have a B.A. in history. 1229 01:20:41,135 --> 01:20:42,002 ... gardening shed ... 1230 01:20:41,642 --> 01:20:44,145 Oh, Henry, how wonderful. 1231 01:20:47,957 --> 01:20:50,300 Whom do I know with a gardening shed? 1232 01:20:54,030 --> 01:20:56,574 I sprayed and the crown gall was gone. 1233 01:21:01,746 --> 01:21:03,205 What an exciting coincidence. 1234 01:21:03,247 --> 01:21:05,082 Have you ever thought of teaching, dear? 1235 01:21:06,000 --> 01:21:09,420 There is an instructorship opening this fall, in history ... 1236 01:21:09,503 --> 01:21:12,882 and there seems to be absolutely no prospect at filling up the place ... 1237 01:21:13,081 --> 01:21:17,181 with so many of the teachers appointed to the science department ... 1238 01:21:39,951 --> 01:21:41,651 ... back in the evening together. 1239 01:21:41,727 --> 01:21:42,519 Never. 1240 01:21:42,970 --> 01:21:44,029 Don't you? 1241 01:21:49,418 --> 01:21:52,505 We could have lunch together in the teachers' cafeteria ... 1242 01:21:53,422 --> 01:21:58,386 and then, every semester, we could grade our term papers together in the study. 1243 01:21:58,803 --> 01:22:02,223 Henrietta, for the last time. I have no inclination to teach. 1244 01:22:02,425 --> 01:22:03,892 No, not the slightest. 1245 01:22:05,342 --> 01:22:07,595 How do you know, dear, if you've never tried? 1246 01:22:08,020 --> 01:22:08,979 Instinct. 1247 01:22:09,366 --> 01:22:12,499 ... on a cash basis ... accrual basis ... 1248 01:22:13,154 --> 01:22:15,821 ... therefore deduct taxes in the year in which they are actually paid ... 1249 01:22:15,903 --> 01:22:16,896 Henry? 1250 01:22:16,946 --> 01:22:19,782 Might as well finish the accounts and get you ... 1251 01:22:19,824 --> 01:22:22,118 and get them out of the way before the end of the week. 1252 01:22:23,369 --> 01:22:26,664 He handles the income taxes rather well. 1253 01:22:26,956 --> 01:22:30,209 Henry, I wanted to ask you something. 1254 01:22:30,543 --> 01:22:33,379 - What? - I wanted to ask you something. 1255 01:22:34,171 --> 01:22:37,466 Well, you know that every summer I go on a field trip ... 1256 01:22:38,342 --> 01:22:39,760 for my research work. 1257 01:22:39,802 --> 01:22:43,806 And ... I was just wondering if this year ... 1258 01:22:43,848 --> 01:22:46,100 it would be alright if I went on a field trip? 1259 01:22:46,183 --> 01:22:48,436 Field trip? For how long? 1260 01:22:48,519 --> 01:22:50,813 Only for a week or two. 1261 01:22:51,022 --> 01:22:54,984 I ... I thought I might go on a canoe trip on the Adirondacks. 1262 01:22:56,360 --> 01:22:57,778 It's ... it's very lovely there. 1263 01:22:57,820 --> 01:22:59,864 It's all sort of tangled and isolated. 1264 01:23:00,364 --> 01:23:04,076 And, erm ... I usually go with one of my students. 1265 01:23:05,145 --> 01:23:08,305 But, erm ... I just ... it just occurred to me ... 1266 01:23:08,622 --> 01:23:15,087 that this year ... you and I might perhaps go together. 1267 01:23:15,212 --> 01:23:17,506 - Together? - To the Adirondacks. 1268 01:23:22,970 --> 01:23:26,390 The Adirondacks. Would we need a guide or anyone? 1269 01:23:27,016 --> 01:23:28,851 Not if we didn't wander from our camp. 1270 01:23:29,977 --> 01:23:32,605 And I would feel perfectly safe with you there, Henry. 1271 01:23:32,897 --> 01:23:35,524 I would feel safer even than with a guide. 1272 01:23:35,858 --> 01:23:37,818 Sounds wonderful, doesn't it? 1273 01:23:38,486 --> 01:23:40,446 Sounds like the answer to everything. 1274 01:23:43,157 --> 01:23:45,451 - Harold, can't I use a suitcase? - I wouldn't if I were you, sir. 1275 01:23:45,493 --> 01:23:49,163 I think carrying a suitcase through the woods would prove something of a hazard. 1276 01:23:49,663 --> 01:23:53,000 - Well, don't forget to pack my Swiss army. - Yes. 1277 01:23:59,006 --> 01:24:02,259 Mrs Graham seems to be a most good-natured lady. sir. 1278 01:24:02,301 --> 01:24:04,970 I'm pleased that the marriage is working out so well. 1279 01:24:05,179 --> 01:24:08,391 She's not good-natured. She is regressed. 1280 01:24:09,225 --> 01:24:13,396 I have never seen such a helpless human being. 1281 01:24:16,899 --> 01:24:21,028 Do you remember some weeks ago, sir, when ... 1282 01:24:21,070 --> 01:24:23,948 when you told me that you'd lost all your money? 1283 01:24:23,989 --> 01:24:26,325 and you had no skills and no ambitions 1284 01:24:26,492 --> 01:24:31,122 Harold, don't forget to pack the compasses and the maps. We will need those. 1285 01:24:31,163 --> 01:24:34,625 Yes, sir. But it seems you do have skills and ambitions. 1286 01:24:34,667 --> 01:24:36,544 I mean, look how you've taken over the house. 1287 01:24:36,585 --> 01:24:39,630 You've learned to handle accounts and grapple with taxes ... 1288 01:24:39,672 --> 01:24:41,048 and you've tidied up Mrs Graham. 1289 01:24:41,090 --> 01:24:44,427 Oh, no. I forgot to check her before she went to school this morning. 1290 01:24:45,094 --> 01:24:48,973 She'll be walking around all day with price tags dangling from her sleeves. 1291 01:24:49,056 --> 01:24:50,307 I took the liberty, sir. 1292 01:24:50,850 --> 01:24:53,060 Oh, thank you Harold. Was she free of crumbs? 1293 01:24:53,102 --> 01:24:55,229 Only a slight sprinkling, sir. I brushed her up. 1294 01:24:55,271 --> 01:24:56,814 Well, sir, my point is, sir ... 1295 01:24:56,939 --> 01:25:00,359 that you have shown the most surprising talent, sir ... 1296 01:25:00,443 --> 01:25:03,988 and although Mrs Graham's helplessness is a little bit irritating at times ... 1297 01:25:04,030 --> 01:25:06,907 couldn't it be in some strange way, sir ... 1298 01:25:07,033 --> 01:25:08,701 that this very helplessness ... 1299 01:25:08,743 --> 01:25:11,662 has been the stimulus of your own amazing new competence? 1300 01:25:11,704 --> 01:25:13,330 I mean, very often, sir ... 1301 01:25:13,372 --> 01:25:15,958 you know, what we... what we dislike most in other people ... 1302 01:25:16,000 --> 01:25:18,919 is only a reflection about our own inadequacies, sir ... 1303 01:25:18,961 --> 01:25:20,337 - and our own shortcomings. - Harold. 1304 01:25:20,379 --> 01:25:23,132 Why don't you pack the revolver? Please put the flask down, Harold. 1305 01:25:23,215 --> 01:25:28,179 Put the flask down. Pack ... never mind. Just put the flask down. Put the revolver down. 1306 01:25:28,220 --> 01:25:30,848 I'll do it. You may go now, Harold. Thank you very much. 1307 01:25:31,640 --> 01:25:33,059 Yes, sir. 1308 01:25:39,482 --> 01:25:44,070 Henry! Henry! Henry! Henry! 1309 01:25:46,410 --> 01:25:47,410 Henry! Henry! 1310 01:25:48,324 --> 01:25:50,117 Easy, Henrietta. I'll be right down. 1311 01:26:03,672 --> 01:26:05,424 - Henry? - I'm here. 1312 01:26:05,841 --> 01:26:10,346 Relax. Just easy. Catch your breath. That's it. 1313 01:26:10,721 --> 01:26:13,015 Relax. Calm down. 1314 01:26:13,974 --> 01:26:17,436 Here we are. Sit down. 1315 01:26:17,478 --> 01:26:22,483 That's it. That's it, now. Catch your breath. What is it? 1316 01:26:23,275 --> 01:26:24,860 It's been accepted. 1317 01:26:25,903 --> 01:26:29,865 My Alsophila ignocardium grahami. They've accepted it. 1318 01:26:29,907 --> 01:26:33,369 Try to speak calm, my dear. What is it they have accepted? 1319 01:26:33,452 --> 01:26:34,954 It's a tropical tree-fern. 1320 01:26:34,995 --> 01:26:37,498 And I discovered it during our honeymoon. 1321 01:26:37,540 --> 01:26:41,669 And when I couldn't classify it, I thought it might be a true species. 1322 01:26:41,794 --> 01:26:44,400 But I couldn't believe it, so I sent it to Wagner ... 1323 01:26:44,550 --> 01:26:50,678 at the University of Michigan. And Henry, it is. It's a true species. 1324 01:26:50,970 --> 01:26:53,723 I've discovered a true species. 1325 01:26:55,266 --> 01:26:59,562 Well. That's very nice. Very nice. 1326 01:27:00,500 --> 01:27:05,192 Well, well. Now you'll be able to name a whole species, won't you? 1327 01:27:05,317 --> 01:27:07,319 Just like ... what's his name? 1328 01:27:07,361 --> 01:27:10,614 - Louis de Bougainville. - That's right. Or James Parkinson. 1329 01:27:11,115 --> 01:27:13,159 Or ... Brussels sprouts. 1330 01:27:13,900 --> 01:27:19,123 Well, well, well. You've achieved the kind of immortality after all, haven't you? 1331 01:27:19,165 --> 01:27:21,542 Now you'll be in all the atlases under L ... 1332 01:27:21,584 --> 01:27:23,878 right before Morgan, Muller and Mendel. 1333 01:27:25,129 --> 01:27:27,298 It would be cross-indexed under G. 1334 01:27:28,466 --> 01:27:30,551 Alsophila grahami, for Graham. 1335 01:27:31,469 --> 01:27:32,219 For Graham? 1336 01:27:33,888 --> 01:27:37,850 You mean that you've discovered a new species and have named it for Graham ... 1337 01:27:37,892 --> 01:27:39,685 after doing all your work as Lowell? 1338 01:27:39,727 --> 01:27:41,729 You fool. That's not the way to name a species. 1339 01:27:41,812 --> 01:27:42,855 Can't you do anything right? 1340 01:27:42,897 --> 01:27:46,359 I didn't name it for me, Henry, I named it for you. 1341 01:27:46,901 --> 01:27:49,570 Alsophila grahami, for Henry Graham. 1342 01:27:50,279 --> 01:27:52,865 Alsophila grahami, for Henry Graham. 1343 01:27:53,407 --> 01:27:57,745 Well, are you sure that they'll know ... I mean, that it's me? 1344 01:27:59,705 --> 01:28:02,291 Will they have my name in the atlas under ... under G? 1345 01:28:02,333 --> 01:28:03,084 For Henry Graham? 1346 01:28:03,125 --> 01:28:06,337 Yes, and they'll have you in all the textbooks, Henry, as a footnote ... 1347 01:28:06,379 --> 01:28:09,090 As a footnote ... and in the atlases under G. 1348 01:28:10,132 --> 01:28:14,345 Well, I've achieved a small slice of immortality myself, haven't I? 1349 01:28:14,387 --> 01:28:16,263 As a footnote and under G. 1350 01:28:16,764 --> 01:28:18,724 Are you pleased, Henry? 1351 01:28:19,225 --> 01:28:22,520 Oh yes, it was very thoughtful of you, Henrietta. I believe I am pleased. 1352 01:28:22,687 --> 01:28:26,857 I put a tip of one fern into a plastic token ... 1353 01:28:26,941 --> 01:28:29,735 so that you can wear it always. If you want to. 1354 01:28:29,860 --> 01:28:35,324 Oh yes. Well, why not? I mean ... it will be a wonderful conversation piece. 1355 01:28:35,574 --> 01:28:39,328 "What frond is in your token, Henry?" 1356 01:28:39,370 --> 01:28:44,375 "Oh, my own frond. An Alsophila grahami. Why do you ask?" 1357 01:28:44,750 --> 01:28:45,876 You like it? 1358 01:28:46,168 --> 01:28:47,878 Yes, yes. very attractive, isn't it? 1359 01:28:47,920 --> 01:28:49,797 Good lines. I mean, for a frond. 1360 01:28:50,089 --> 01:28:54,343 Don't you ... don't you think it should be under ... under L. I mean ... 1361 01:28:54,385 --> 01:28:57,596 Alsophila lowellia or something? 1362 01:28:57,888 --> 01:29:00,683 I feel as though you've given me your place in the atlases. 1363 01:29:00,725 --> 01:29:04,854 Henry, I don't think I could have ever discovered it without you. 1364 01:29:04,979 --> 01:29:06,772 You gave me confidence. 1365 01:29:06,814 --> 01:29:12,028 You remember? You said that if being with you was going to give me confidence ... 1366 01:29:12,069 --> 01:29:14,989 I was going to be a very confident botanist. 1367 01:29:16,407 --> 01:29:17,616 Well, you were right. 1368 01:29:22,121 --> 01:29:26,333 Alsophila grahami. Well, well, well ... 1369 01:29:32,715 --> 01:29:35,968 Henrietta, what happens if you get lost in these woods? 1370 01:29:36,343 --> 01:29:40,431 - Well, various things. - Various things such as what? 1371 01:29:40,514 --> 01:29:42,224 For example, if there is a stream ... 1372 01:29:43,267 --> 01:29:45,311 then you would follow the stream. 1373 01:29:45,394 --> 01:29:48,939 - Which way? - We would follow the stream upstream. 1374 01:29:51,025 --> 01:29:53,736 Henry, I'm having such a wonderful time. 1375 01:29:53,861 --> 01:29:58,240 Our entire marriage has been like a long, beautiful field trip. 1376 01:29:58,366 --> 01:30:01,202 That's nice. That makes me feel better somehow. 1377 01:30:13,113 --> 01:30:14,501 Would you like some more Z11? 1378 01:30:14,941 --> 01:30:17,574 No thank you. It's the Z11 that's attracting them. 1379 01:30:17,635 --> 01:30:18,928 It's a repellent. 1380 01:30:18,969 --> 01:30:20,596 So they would lead you to believe. 1381 01:30:25,393 --> 01:30:27,478 Would you like some more Calamine lotion, dear? 1382 01:30:27,520 --> 01:30:29,438 No, thank you. It only makes it itch more. 1383 01:30:31,899 --> 01:30:35,361 They say that if you don't scratch, it itches less. 1384 01:30:35,403 --> 01:30:36,362 Well, they're wrong. 1385 01:30:36,404 --> 01:30:39,281 It only looks like it itches less because you're not scratching. 1386 01:30:41,409 --> 01:30:44,453 One just got me on the bridge of the nose. 1387 01:30:46,455 --> 01:30:47,998 Should we put something on it? 1388 01:30:49,375 --> 01:30:50,543 No, thank you. 1389 01:30:58,134 --> 01:31:01,178 From now on, Henrietta, I'll make the coffee. 1390 01:31:01,846 --> 01:31:02,847 Yes, dear. 1391 01:31:27,288 --> 01:31:28,789 You're all sticky, Henrietta. 1392 01:31:29,749 --> 01:31:31,417 I spilled the honey. 1393 01:31:34,879 --> 01:31:35,963 Here, Henrietta. 1394 01:31:37,631 --> 01:31:41,552 From now on, dear, I'll make the dinner. 1395 01:31:42,720 --> 01:31:43,888 What will I do? 1396 01:31:44,013 --> 01:31:45,014 You'll eat. 1397 01:31:53,898 --> 01:31:55,941 It seems easier to paddle somehow. 1398 01:31:55,983 --> 01:32:00,029 That's because the current gets stronger as we approach the rapids. 1399 01:32:00,321 --> 01:32:02,198 Look, dear, aren't they beautiful? 1400 01:32:03,382 --> 01:32:03,999 What? 1401 01:32:04,433 --> 01:32:05,559 The rapids. 1402 01:32:09,955 --> 01:32:11,123 Those are the rapids? 1403 01:32:11,207 --> 01:32:15,419 Yes. Just tell me exactly what to do, dear. I'm a very good sailor. 1404 01:32:15,836 --> 01:32:17,755 Paddle like hell towards shore! 1405 01:32:21,363 --> 01:32:22,463 Aaaah! 1406 01:32:22,542 --> 01:32:24,669 - What? - Never mind! 1407 01:32:24,970 --> 01:32:27,056 - Never mind? - Never mind! 1408 01:32:27,098 --> 01:32:30,226 Do I have to paddle in any particular direction, dear? 1409 01:32:30,267 --> 01:32:32,019 Full harder to the left side! 1410 01:32:33,688 --> 01:32:35,815 The left side! Full harder! 1411 01:32:39,318 --> 01:32:43,489 Although we keep fulling on the left side, we seem to be heading towards the bank. 1412 01:32:44,624 --> 01:32:46,642 Aaaahhh! The right side! 1413 01:32:47,410 --> 01:32:48,536 The right side! 1414 01:32:56,335 --> 01:32:58,796 Henry, how much longer do the rapids go on? 1415 01:32:59,964 --> 01:33:00,881 That's odd. 1416 01:33:02,508 --> 01:33:03,843 It just seems to stop. 1417 01:33:04,093 --> 01:33:09,890 Oh, Henry! Listen! Henry, it sounds like a waterfall! 1418 01:33:09,932 --> 01:33:12,476 Oh my God. That's what it is. 1419 01:33:12,518 --> 01:33:14,729 It just stops and becomes a waterfall. 1420 01:33:15,104 --> 01:33:18,274 Paddle like hell towards the bank! Towards the bank! 1421 01:33:18,441 --> 01:33:21,027 There is no bank! There is just a lot of rocks! 1422 01:33:41,922 --> 01:33:42,882 Henry? 1423 01:33:45,509 --> 01:33:46,635 Henry? 1424 01:33:46,927 --> 01:33:48,304 I can't ... 1425 01:33:48,846 --> 01:33:51,932 I can't swim. 1426 01:34:28,684 --> 01:34:30,084 Henry! 1427 01:34:30,471 --> 01:34:35,810 Henrietta, you hold on on to that log until I tell you to let go! 1428 01:34:49,532 --> 01:34:54,245 The canoe overturned. I looked desperately through the waters but ... 1429 01:34:54,286 --> 01:34:56,997 I ... I couldn't find her. 1430 01:34:58,666 --> 01:34:59,792 Henry? 1431 01:35:04,046 --> 01:35:06,700 And ... if only she had told me she couldn't swim. 1432 01:35:07,400 --> 01:35:09,844 If only we had taken a guide. 1433 01:35:11,262 --> 01:35:15,850 But she had her heart set on going with me alone. 1434 01:35:19,145 --> 01:35:22,565 Alright, Henrietta! I'm ready for you now! 1435 01:35:22,606 --> 01:35:27,987 Take a deep breath, hold your nose and let go! 1436 01:35:47,214 --> 01:35:49,967 Henrietta, look. I mean ... 1437 01:35:52,219 --> 01:35:55,639 Look. An Alsophila grahami. 1438 01:36:00,686 --> 01:36:02,980 Alsophila grahami. 1439 01:36:04,523 --> 01:36:06,317 Up here, in the north woods. 1440 01:36:20,498 --> 01:36:23,292 I've lost it. I've lost my token. 1441 01:36:24,585 --> 01:36:26,629 I've lost my Alsophila grahami. 1442 01:36:27,421 --> 01:36:28,255 Henrietta. 1443 01:36:28,964 --> 01:36:31,258 Henrietta! Dammit to hell! 1444 01:36:32,051 --> 01:36:34,804 Damn, damn, damn! Nothing ever turns out the way it's supposed to be ... 1445 01:36:34,887 --> 01:36:38,265 Work a plan. Henrietta! Dammit! 1446 01:36:52,196 --> 01:36:56,242 Alright. You may breathe now, Henrietta. 1447 01:36:58,244 --> 01:37:00,329 You may breathe now. Let go of your nose. 1448 01:37:03,124 --> 01:37:06,334 Now, hold my shoulders. Face me. Hold my shoulders. That's it. 1449 01:37:06,718 --> 01:37:10,800 Hold on to them. Alright. Hold them. 1450 01:37:10,806 --> 01:37:13,559 Breathe, breathe. Through your mouth. 1451 01:37:13,634 --> 01:37:16,300 Keep your chin up. Chin up. 1452 01:37:16,600 --> 01:37:19,348 Breathe through your mouth. That's it. 1453 01:37:19,557 --> 01:37:22,101 And if you taste water, spit it out. 1454 01:37:23,394 --> 01:37:28,983 Don't spit on me, Henrietta. Just spit the water out into the river. 1455 01:37:30,276 --> 01:37:35,740 That's it. That's it. Now breathe. Very good. 1456 01:37:59,347 --> 01:38:04,977 Here now. Sit down in the sun and warm up. 1457 01:38:06,310 --> 01:38:07,610 That's right. 1458 01:38:15,547 --> 01:38:16,547 That's right. 1459 01:38:18,456 --> 01:38:19,456 There. 1460 01:38:19,950 --> 01:38:21,202 Are you still cold? 1461 01:38:22,286 --> 01:38:25,623 Well, I better hold you. My body should provide some warmth. 1462 01:38:37,319 --> 01:38:40,058 Henry. Henry. Henry? 1463 01:38:41,949 --> 01:38:44,882 I'll always be able to depend on you, won't I? 1464 01:38:44,934 --> 01:38:46,644 All the rest of my life? 1465 01:38:46,977 --> 01:38:48,813 I'm afraid so. 1466 01:38:49,480 --> 01:38:52,650 Henry, the history classes are going to be much smaller this year. 1467 01:38:52,692 --> 01:38:54,652 Henrietta, I'm not going to teach history. 1468 01:38:54,735 --> 01:38:55,820 Probably. 1469 01:38:56,821 --> 01:39:02,284 It seems a shame, though, Henry. You are a very talented man. 1470 01:39:05,538 --> 01:39:07,498 Are you sure you won't change your mind? 1471 01:39:07,623 --> 01:39:10,710 I don't know. I have no mind as far as I can tell. 1472 01:39:13,129 --> 01:39:14,296 Are you still cold? 1473 01:39:15,673 --> 01:39:17,800 - I'm a little warmer. - Good. 1474 01:39:23,723 --> 01:39:27,193 - Henry? Henry? - Yes? 1475 01:39:31,603 --> 01:39:36,670 I know that this isn't exactly what you planned. 1476 01:39:38,595 --> 01:39:39,554 What? 1477 01:39:42,116 --> 01:39:44,702 But will you mind doing it very much? 1478 01:39:46,287 --> 01:39:47,747 Being a history instructor? 1479 01:39:48,789 --> 01:39:51,083 And going to the university with you in the mornings? 1480 01:39:52,376 --> 01:39:57,923 And ... grading term papers with you in the study every semester? 1481 01:40:00,134 --> 01:40:01,427 Not terribly. 1482 01:40:06,724 --> 01:40:09,727 Come. I think we'd better go.